I'm getting towards the end of this month long project, and I've realized that I haven't done a lot to prepare for the actual day of the birth. Ok, is it alright if I call it Nugget's "Name Day" instead of birthday? It's the first step towards Nugget's ascension to the Iron Throne...(anyone ready for Game of Thrones to start up again...so am I!)
Preparing to be a dad has been an important and worthwhile endeavor. But I know that preparing for that first day is going to be equally important. So last night, Elizabeth and I started thinking about our birth plan.
Now, I know what some of you may be thinking ("some of you" being those that haven't gone through the whole pregnancy thing). "Birth plan...doesn't the woman just have the baby?" Well, yes, that's true. But there are so many different ways to go nowadays. Like so much of what I have researched for this project, each has it's pros and cons, each has it's supporters and it's detractors. It's a personal choice, and each will work differently for different parents. What follows are my thoughts on several different methods that we looked in to. Please note that if you went through any of these, I in no way want to poke fun at you. They just weren't for us, that's all.
Home Birth
This one was thrown out right out of the gate. I know that people who do this say it helps make them more relaxed, that you are on your home turf so that makes you more comfortable while having your baby. But there are not enough cleaning products in the world to get what happens in a birth out of our mattress and out of our bedroom. I'm sorry to anyone that has done this, but we would have to sell the house. If I found one corpuscle, that would be the end of it.
C-Section
Ok so this isn't so much a plan, more a back up. I was a C-Section baby, and I guess I turned out alright...
We know that this type of birth is a "break the glass" scenario, and if has to happen then it has to happen. We just aren't going in to this thinking it's our Plan A.
Traditional (at a hospital)
This is the one that is featured most prominently in movies and TV shows. The mom is reenacting the dinner scene from Alien while the partner is being a nuisance (Hugh Grant faints in Nine Months...if only I could have done the same before the movie started...). There's a lot of pushing, a lot of screaming, and a whole lot of crying. It's been said that war is hell. Judging by what is shown in the media, a delivery room must be a suburb of Hell.
I watched some videos of this method (my eyes feel like they do when I've looked at the Sun too long). And really, it depends on the baby and depends on the mother. Some deliveries are smooth sailing, with little pain experienced by the mother. Some are marathons of agony with a lot of...tearing (I just shuddered typing that. I'm so, so, so sorry Elizabeth, for doing this to you).
All of this is done in a hospital, so that's the major bonus there. Patton Oswalt has a great bit about his hippie friends telling him to have his first child at home like the pioneers. "You know what the pioneers dreamed of while they were having their babies?" he asks, "...HOSPITALS!" He goes on to say he wants the most modern birth possible, and I would tend to agree with him there. That's why this is the method that is probably our back up. I know that no matter what happens, I will be up at the top end with Elizabeth. Being down at the bottom will lead to me pulling a Hugh Grant.
Water Birth
Ding ding ding, we have a winner!
At first glance, I thought this was more Whole Foods nonsense. I mistakenly thought that "water birth" meant "home birth in a tub," so that meant I'd never go into the bathroom at my house again. Chlorox would be unable to produce bleach fast enough for the quantities I would be buying.
But this just wasn't the case at all. In fact, we were able to see videos of water births at the Greensboro Women's Hospital, which is where we will be having Nugget. (Note to self: don't let Elizabeth watch anymore baby movies, because they make her cry too much).
The idea is that being in a pool of warm water relaxes you and aids in the birth. All of the pressure that you normally feel in traditional settings is taken away, and it makes for a far more comfortable experience. You do have to provide the equipment (a blow up kiddie pool was what we saw the most of). There is some pain, but it is said to be dramatically less than other alternatives. The baby is used to being in liquid, having survived in it for 9 months, so it provides a smoother transition into the world for them.
Plus, it means that instead of spending his first moments in the world surrounded by crying and yelling, he'll get to spend them as Aquaman. And that is fantastic.
So that's what we are going with at this time. Of course, no plan survives contact with reality, and I know that there will be tweaks along the way. We may get to the Name Day (it just sounds cooler!) and the water birth is not an option. We will take it in stride, though, and know that no matter what we'll get to meet Nugget.
I'm just really hoping now that his first day involves a pool party!
No comments:
Post a Comment